1) Heading to Penguicon. Erm. Tomorrow, though. Early as I can roust splash_the_cat from her warm bed. I am not on panels, but I intend to meet Mary Robinette in person, and hand $5 to E Bear. All other bets are off as to what may happen.

1a) Resolution: I will not spend more than $10 in the dealer's room, and only if they have something I really need.

2) Tomorrow is my husband's birthday, which is why I'm not heading to Penguicon tonight. We are celebrating tonight. With massive quantities of Mongolian barbecue and Carvel.

3) the_flea_king just emailed to say Escape Pod would like to buy "An Almanac for the Alien Invaders." I'm very pleased! Contracts a-coming...

My friends amuse me. Almost as much as my husband!

Speaking of husband, he keeps saying he might attend Penguicon for a day in order to see Wil Wheaton.

This, of course, reminded me that Wil Wheaton will be at Penguicon, which is one of those things I've known, but haven't acknowledged in my soul. Until now.

This led to twenty minutes of pondering the things I will not say to Wil Wheaton when I show up with book in hand to the mass autograph signing.

Things Not to Mention to Wil Wheaton: a partial list

1. I will not say anything that starts with "Oh my God," and hopefully also not "Oh-Em-GEEEE." Even though I say these things often enough in real life, I know it's not cool.

2. I will not make references to how much I might have to pee, no matter what the state of my bladder.

3. I will not say, "You know, I never once bought a teen magazine, but this girl in homeroom used to tear out the pictures of you from Tiger Beat and extort me into buying them for a dime, because I once said I liked you in Stand by Me. And it was extortion, because even though I loved you with the unholy love of a pubescent Star Trek geek, none of those pictures were very attractive."

4. I will not say, "I used to debate with myself if I loved you or Christian Bale more--between Stand by Me and Empire of the Sun. But I then never saw Newsies, so you won."

5. I will not say, "In 1988 I wrote, 'I'm pretty sure it's not love, because I've never met him, I mean, it's not like my neighbor who says she's in love with Kirk Cameron' in my diary, which I think shows that I was a pretty emotionally intelligent back in the day, so I wasn't that fan, right, Wil? RIGHT?!?"

6. I will not mention that I had mall-bangs at the height of my interest in him. I think that hints that perhaps I was shallow.

7. I won't tell him about this white shirt I had with a green stripe across the chest that made me think of his Acting Ensign outfit on TNG, because I'm already embarrassed to be talking about here on my journal. Even though I loved that shirt.

So... uhm. Yeah. Let me tuck my dirty laundry back inside, and hope I got that all out of my system.

Anyone else have some things to get out of the way before they confront their inner seventh-grader in a few months?

I'm terrible sleepsity right now, but I must post my ConFusion schedule (ConFusion: http://www.stilyagi.org/cons/confusion.html), where I anticipate meeting catrambo and buying jimhines some sort of beverage to say, "Thanks for being The Awesome Guy on the Internets Who Gives Me Hope for Humanity." And such things of that nature.

I will also be there with the usual suspects... the splash_the_cat, the daveamongus, the vidensadastra, the iuliamentis, of course (three of these come with the hotel room!), and hope to see the becoming-usual steve_buchheit, jeffreyab... and many more! (Is this a tappu year? I will find out shortly!)

My panels this year:

Smut and Nothing but Smut 10:00 PM Friday Dennison III
David Rozian, Kelley Armstrong, Anne Harris, Merrie Haskell, and Violette Malan
A discussion of sex scenes in genre fiction and whether they have any redeeming literary value or are they just inserted for prurient interest to sell the book.
I'm not afraid of this one. I have... Opinions.

The Short Story 12:00 PM Saturday Salon E
Cat Rambo, William Jones, Merrie Haskell, Jim Hines [M], and Steve Buchheit
The best of these are an art form unto themselves. Where can we find them? How has the electronic age affected them? Selling short stories -- aimed at telling people how to submit short stories, how to get started and keep it up.
Can do this one in my sleep at this point, which is fortunate, because I'm going to need sleep.

Paranormal Romance: Meet the New Boss 3:00 PM Saturday Salon H
Kelley Armstrong, Melody Barker, Merrie Haskell [M], Steven Harper Piziks
Meet the New Boss about love, vampires and werewolves is the new economic engine of the genre. Where did it come from? Who writes it? Who reads it?
I'm glad I'm moderating, because the sudden appearance of Kelley Armstrong has sort of awed me. Shockingly, I'm much less opinionated in front of persons with more experience and authority than me. However, if you have any advice--or better, questions--about Paranormal Romance, comment with them! I'll attempt to write a semi-decent panel report in return.

Gadgetering 12:00 PM Sunday Dennison I/II
Cory Doctorow, David Rozian, Merrie Haskell, Philip Edward Kaldon and Freon
Creating gadgets in SCIENCE fiction
I'm not sure why SCIENCE is all capitalized like that? But I'm not sure that this is a *hard* topic? Just writers saying, "Well, I do thus and such?" and "Boy howdy, I like Q." Am I underthinking this? Why am I the only woman? Am I doing gadgets wrong in my fiction? Am I undergadgety to be on this panel, or am I overgadgety for my gender? I'll let you know next week, I guess.

Anyway, I'll be around. Comment if you want to meet up. Pop me an email if you want my cell number. (mythos (at) merrie haskell (dot) com)

I don't think anything is going to happen to LJ. I mean, it *could*. But I don't think it will. I'm optimistic like that.

( But, come the Russiapocalypse )

Shoot. I meant to be getting into bed by now. Still so much to do... We're hitting the gym hard tomorrow, and I have a post office run pending, and I wanted to send out the Ophelia story again.... There's never enough time. And ConFusion is coming up!

Also... anyone need a roommate for Anticipation? I'm not committing to anything just yet since I haven't fully decided to go, but consider this me putting out feelers. Also, I think I'm going to drive in from Michigan. Ten hours is no biggie in summer, and I want to see some of Canada.

Much as I'd love to do a good old-fashioned con report on ConClave 33, I cannot. I attended a whopping one panel, led by my buds daveamongous (Dave Klecha for his fans) and Steve Buccheit (bee-YOU-hite, she repeats softly to herself), who made his first story sale at the con, you go, Steve.

AND, I forgot (read: couldn't find) my con notebook. I feel I've done something tragically smart like put it away in my con bag, and no longer know what my con bag should be, so it's lost until I find it again.

Anyway. I did learn a fair amount from other panelists, though the most most most MOST excellent piece of advice was from msagara (Michelle Sagara West) in the "What I wish some pro had told me when I was starting out..." panel: "I wish I'd known it was okay to be myself."

( Which percolated. )

Beyond hanging out with my Con-Spouse, splash_the_cat, and my Karmic Revenge, Mary Lou Klecha / Dave's sis / vidensadastra, and the aforementioned Dave and Steve, I got to hang with jeffreyab a leetle bit, as well as the super-awesome fan GoH's, Anne Brett and Lee Carroll; Sarah Zettel (fearless leader of my writing group-Sarah); the new-met and totally awesome, whiskey-voiced Anne Harris; Anne Zanoni, who I think does more by 10AM than I do all night, or something cleverer than I can come up with right now (she's got a lot of energy, alright?)....

And I had so many panels I didn't know what to do. Like the old woman who lived in a shoe... I had ten panels! I couldn't even tell you everyone I was on panels with. Well, I could if I looked through the con book. Most notably, Tiffany Aaron and I managed to hold down the whole panel on settings by our lonesome, as did Freon and I for most of "Research is an Art." I did get to panel with jimhines, twice I think, and that was great. He's such a cool, nice guy. Uhm. Also. We (we being the Klecha Clutch and Jim) did not not make up a new movement called noodlepunk. Because that would be absurd.

If I think of more substantive content than Who I Saw Eating Granola Bars, I will plonk it down later. Right now, I am le tired.

Quantum Kiss has bravely bought my excessively long story "The Wedding Dress Tea Parties of 2443," which is:

• the story I worked on while I was at Milford in Wales and having a most wonderful time
  
• the first (and so far only) story title I plucked from my spam filter
  
• more or less a Regency romance in space, plus a little screwball comedy, plus a little science fiction of manners
  
• loooooong

So! Uhm. Sale! *eyes inventory* That's getting a leeetle low, you know?

---

And I just happened to notice that Tangent Online has been offline for a year today. *tear*

---

And okay, my ConClave 33 schedule. Read it and weep! For me! Preferably, weep tears of Red Bull.

Friday:

Fri 6:00 PM Br 7 Michelle Sagara, Merrie Haskell, Jim Hines
Things I Wish Some Pro had told me when I was starting out: No-nonsense professional advice on how to build your career as a professional writer, what to do after you have sold your first story or novel, details on contracts, editors, etc.

Fri 7:00 PM Br 7 Michelle Sagara, Merrie Haskell
Why write under a pseudonym? What are the advantages and disadvantages of using a pseudonym?


Saturday:

Sat 10:00 AM Atlantis M. Keaton, Merrie Haskell, Dave Klecha, Jim Hines, Steve Buchheit, Ferrel "Rick" Moore
Writer's Workshop: Open Writer Q&A

Sat 11:00 AM Br 7 Tiffany Aaron, Steven Climer, Michelle Sagara, Merrie Haskell
Creating Settings: How are they created? How can they be used to fill out the background of the story giving texture and detail without overwhelming the plot? The writers will talk about where the settings came from and how they were developed. At the end of the discussion the audience can choose a picture, list words describing a setting based on it and write a paragraph putting the words together and voila: a setting is created.

Sat 12:00 PM Atlantis Merrie Haskell, Wanda DeAngelo, M. Keaton
Who are the Aliens? We will take a detailed look at aliens of SF/F. Are they simply a modified extension of our own cultures and species? Does exploring aliens help us understand ourselves? Would we understand a truly alien species and culture?


Sat 1:00 PM Br 6 Steven Climer, Merrie Haskell, Wanda DeAngelo
Research is an Art: How is research done? What is the best way to research? How much is too much? How much is to little?


Sat 4:00 PM Br 8 Tiffany Aaron, Merrie Haskell, Daniel J. Hogan, Steve Buchheit
Gee, I wish I thought of that. Where do writers get their ideas?


Sat 5:00 PM Apollo Merrie Haskel, Christie Halle Devlin, Dave Klecha

Christianity in SF&F: How has Christianity influenced and been used(and misused) in science fiction and fantasy? Where did the Lords of Kobol, Klaatu, exorcists, and anime nuns come from?

Sat 7:00 PM Atlantis Merrie Haskell, Daniel J. Hogan, Michael LaFlamme, Michael Poe, Jim Hines, Lucy Synder
Humor in Science Fiction and Fantasy: Where has the laughter gone? Isn't laughter as important as technical wonders in Science Fiction?

Sunday
Sun 2:00 PM Br 7 Michelle Sagara, Tracy Chowdhury, Merrie Haskell
From Idea to Story: How do I take my great idea and write a great story. In this panel we will discuss the process from your mental idea to the written form. What are the techniques you need to use to make your idea come to life and flesh.

Gaugh, I'm sorry, I'm spamming you all with WorldCon reports, but I know no bettwer way. Well, I do--but it involves waiting until I get back to the USofA, and that won't be for another few weeks. Spam now, or spam later? You see what I chose.

I went to a panel this morning, which I have not typed up yet. I moderated an Evil Stepmother discussion. I sat in on a kaffeeklatsch with papersky, thus fulfilling my promise made last year. I am now waiting for my roommate to finish her massage, so she can hop online and do whatever work-things he needs to do, and then we are going to dinner, and then, tomorrow, I may or may not get up and check my mail one more time before abandoning the internet until August 21st or 22nd or something.

Criminy, I miss my husband right now. I'm not sure why. I mean, I know I'm used to having him around, and I know I like having him around, and I know a lot of things about it, but I've also rationally gone over this again and again... I don't need him for anything--nothing that can't wait two weeks, anyway. If someone could explain the biomechanical mess behind missing someone, I'd be most obliged. If not, oh, well. I'm sure I'll miss him more before I'm done over here. Tomorrow, I'm going to tromp around Hadrian's Wall a bit and think about being a Roman time travler. The day after, I'm going to bop around Haworth and think about alternate realities involving the Brontes. The day after that, I'm going to visit--well, I haven't decided yet, and I'm dithering between Chatsworth and York and Scarborough. And then, whatever is left over. And then, I'm going to drive to Wales. I think I'll stop in Chester along the way. I've long had a wish to see Chester. Geez. I think it's Chester.

(papersky taught me how to say Nantlle, by the way. I'm pleased. And deeply intrigued about the linguistic capabilities of the different flavors of English speakers.)

The interesting/unfortunate thing is, I think I'm running out of new places to see in Britain. I could probably do another week of my life in Wales. One in Cornwall and that area--Tintagel and Lyme Regis, particularly, need to be seen. The Highlands. Ireland. But then--nothing I've dreamed of will be new again. I'm a little sad. I don't mind revisiting, but it's just not the same.

Though. If I ever come back to Glasgow, I'm not bringing a car. Both times it's been a nightmare. I don't care if I have to train in from Edinburgh--NO cars in Glasgow again!

Sunday Con

Had a harder time sleeping the night previous, so I got up late. I think. Man, it's only been two days, and I've already forgotten.

I headed to the Lost panel for grins--massive amounts of fanchilding from both the panel and the audience. Nothing of note to report. (Oh, I did just now remember that the Battlestar panel claimed that we'd be seeing the third-in-command this season.)

( Genre Killing Ideas )

( Is the Future Non-Western? )

Then I went to "Improving Your Writing."

That, I must say, was probably my last panel of this sort at a con, ever. My writing has gotten to the point where no amount of 50 minute tips-and-tricks sessions are going to make an impact. On the other hand, this was a good one to go out on, because they were pretty darn comprehensive. I don't think I've missed anything on this level.

That said, Simon R. Green was very funny, and told good stories about how he got published. The rest of the panelists were pretty good--Steve Nagy was from the OWW, and passed out flyers. Other folks were Rowena Lindquist (Cory Daniels), Gary Gibson, and Deborah Turner Harris.

After this, I poked my head into The Incredibles panel, but I wasn't deeply enamored of the discussion. I mostly sat in to kill time, and I was out of emotional readiness to attack a bigger, deeper panel. Afterwards, I went out to sit in the sun and eat a sandwich, then went back in to nab a seat at the Hugos.

And oh, the Hugos. The extended riff on how the Hugos are named after Victor Hugo entertained exceeding. And, then, with Scottish efficiency, people went up and down from that stage like I've never seen in an awards show. You know what? The Scots should run the Oscars.

However.

We all knew matociquala had won the Campbell before the nominees were finished being named. A rather silly close-up of the award, an ill-timed movement on the award-holder's part, and the light caught the gold letters just so... and "Elizabeth Bear" flashed across the screen, almost like the hand of God had beamed down a mote of sunlight. My whole row was laughing, while the award-presenter was pretending to fumble with the envelope. (Did he know? I didn't think he did.)

Came back, went to parties, drank more than I expected, came back to the room, ate lots of cheese to soak up the alcohol, wrote, slept.

And that was Sunday.

Report: WorldCon 2005

First of all, you must know that everything is very s p r e a d out.

So, when I say that I arrived late to the first panel I attended on Friday at noon (we went grocery shopping in the morning, and then I finally ate some protein and felt a bit less like a hollow rendition of myself), you'll know that it wasn't from disrespect.

After all, I tried to attend, in order: "The Return of the Queen" (writing believably feministish heroines in medieval fiction!), "Immortal in SF" and "Clones and Long Lives," and was turned away from each because they were full... So, when I sat down and mapped out what I wanted to attend next and just decided that I would sit in (assuming it wasn't full) on whatever was being held there before whatever was next, it was already 12:30, because, as I mentioned, things are a bit spread out.

( What's Hot, What's Not )

( Fantastic Cities )

( Not Letting Research Get in the Way of Your Imagination )

At this point, I was hungry and such, so I busied myself with eating a sandwich.

And then, there was the disastrous trip through the Dealer's Room. Well, it wasn't SUPER disastrous. But I spent more at elisem's table than I meant to (meaning, I'd meant to spend nothing), but "Elven Souvenier Stands" were shouting to me. And a pendant. BUT I DID NOT BUY ANYTHING ELSE. Through sheer willpower. Anyway, we had a nice conversation, and then I had a nice conversation with charlieallery, who sold me a subscription to Farthing... and I picked up two copies of the issue of Locus with the review of "Huntswoman" in it (my birthday-present subscription from riffalike started in June). (Of course, I grabbed one copy of the correct issue, and one copy of an issue I already own, and had to go back...)

And I did not approach papersky in the Dealer's Room, because she was clearly involved with a group of people. If she had been standing alone, believe you me, I would have gone to speak with her, after the ribbing I took last year. (There's a happy end to this story, if you don't know that I'm kidding.)

After that, I hied me off to the Green Room, where I found a uniced diet Pepsi (InterAction is quite frank about the fact that they don't have the money of North American cons, and there's nothing free doled out in the Con Suite, and participants get one free drink per panel). carriem??? (When I get back to the States and have more time on the IntarWeb, I shall verify her identity) was the only one of my co-panelers who made it there any significant bit before time, and we chatted about SG-1, splash_the_cat and astolat/naominovik. (dsudis, I picked up some of the PR materials for Shalott's book with you in mind...)

And then, the panel, just in the next room over. Jane Yolen was a wee bit late (only moments), but most of us had already introduced ourselves. "I'm so-and-so, and I'm on this panel because I rewrote such-and-such." (It was, after all, the panel on rewriting fantasy and fairy tales.) Then Jane came in, smiled at us on the panel and said, "I'm Jane Yolen, and I've rewritten more fairy tales than all of you put together." And since this was very true, we all just nodded. It was fun. I probably learned more than I contributed, but, hey.

After the panel, Jed Hartman stopped me to say hi, and after him, apotropaism did the same. Of course, from her I learned I've a) been saying her LJ name in my head TOTALLY WRONG, though now I spell it out, I wonder what the heck I was thinking; b) she's from the Channel Islands. I was also very wrong about that. (Boy am I Americo-centric. I know, shocking, an American thinks everyone online is American. But I do try not to be that way.)

I'm typing the second half of this up on Monday, so I can't really remember what I did next. I wasn't ready to party, so I think I may have written for a little bit and gone to bed.

I've gotten a rather lot of writing done, this Con...

Sheesh, I'm not online for like what, four days, and only six of the people I know in real life update LJ? C'mon, peeps!

splash_the_cat, how was your birthday? I picked up some cheesy Farscape bookmarks for you, and was on a panel with a huge SG-1 fan who's also an academic... She's sorta heard of you. (Pretty good, considering she's a slasher.)

dannimal, are you alive? You make me send you a "got here ok" email, and no acknowledgment, I tell ya...

Uhm... Lessee... my first panel went well. Got to sit next to Jane Yolen. And talk to her. Saw Anne McCaffrey at a distance. That's pretty much the extent of my brushing-with-fame. What I did this Con that I haven't before is to volunteer--I turned myself over to the newsletter, thinking I'd be making sure that at-con newsletter came out of the printer straight and the printer didn't jam. Of course, the issue's editor asked, "Do you have any skills?"--so I told him how fast I can type, and assured him I knew a thing or two about grammer, and became an inputter and editor-on-the-fly. It was fantastic. Just a small cog moment, but six of the items I input are in the newsletter, exactly as I edited them, and I'm quite foolishly proud. And my name's nowhere on the thing. Heh.

Other than that, I'm doing quite well, now that the main burden of the travel is over. I miss being at a Con with friends, I have to say; it's a bit of a task to try to find people to eat with, though mostly, I don't. It's ok, scarfing down a sandwich between panels is not a problem, and that's about all the food I can bear to eat in Britain anyway (unless we're talking Indian). Actually, that's not entirely true; the food in this country seems to have improved over the last few years. Maybe it's because I'm no longer attempting bus station pasties.

I did have lunch with Stephanie Burgis and her husband, Patrick Samphire, yesterday. (Sandwiches, of course.) And my roommate, Weller, kindly snagged me a croissant this morning while I was sleeping, and that's nice--we don't hang out much, but we do each seem to be looking out for the other, and just the thought that someone here would care if I didn't make it home at night is reassuring. Sure, I enjoy traveling by myself, but driving in Glasgow is a freakin' joke.

Tonight the Hugos.

Got my fingers crossed for matociquala!